Forever Free – Finding Your Real Self
– Testimonial and Ch-alice Art Gallery
My 10 week journey with Lorenzo and Cambell
By Antonia X
Cambell and Lorenzo take no prisoners. They are not here to gain your servitude they are here to set you free. The journey I walked to freedom was an intense one, on it I meet the pieces of myself that I at the time of the encounter would have rather not have seen. Those parts of myself I had locked away, or that someone else had locked away, or that events had locked away. On this journey it did not matter how they got locked away, trapped or boxed off, Cambell and Lorenzo took out the blame in this game of finding myself. Instead of walking that route of blame I was guided to untie myself. To realign with what was most important, most fundamental, most authentic. By doing this I found and honed the labyrinth of my own being. Daily I was challenged to walk my talk and this strengthen the inner circuits of my mind, emotions and body. I woke up one morning in week 9 and realized I simultaneously had a voice and was using it. That I had chiselled out some sort of balance with my actions.
The key Cambell and Lorenzo share with you is how to reconnect to all those lost pieces of yourself. How to buzz with life and energy and fun and hope and excitement for the future.
My experience by the end of the journey is that full power is contagious. It has been an uplifting. Ultimately this is why we choose to come together. It is very human and natural to share and dance, and love and play in the company of like minded souls. With those who have been on interesting journeys to find all those sparkly Gems, those pearls of wisdom that got seeded in the deep earth and magnitude of our past experiences.
Undoubtedly it’s a challenge to meet yourself, to bear the flesh of what you have eaten to become who you are today. To have a look at what’s clothed those spiritual bones. What does your meet look like, can you look at yourself in the mirror? I found it very difficult to through the majority of this course.
I did not love myself and it was a 10 week journey of hell looking at myself, and developing that self awareness. It is difficult sitting in front of Cambell and Lorenzo, both of whom are there meeting you with their gaze, their light. Asking you to look at yourself, exposing the flaws of your thinking and self delusion. They do it kindly though it it still feels difficult, they do it sportively though it is still hard to bare the sight. To allow that vulnerability.
I did find at the crux of that vulnerability and openness, I was given a chance to change. To die in the light of what I could see. I got brought back to myself because there was nothing else. There was nowhere to hide. And truly I tried very hard to hide, I was running around in circles like a headless chicken. The eyes of Cambell and Lorenzo were to keen, to sharpen, honed by the journeys they have already made to become who they are, I could not hide, because I was fully encircled by their presence. It is a very big gift to have someone present.
What a privilege to be in the company of that kind of love. That kind of care, that kind of intention and sharing. And what hope there is for the future when this exists.
Who are we to judge how we got here, at this page of this book with these people. Our choices were our choices at the time. The point is (and thank you Lorenzo for so powerfully chiselling me to the point at times) Our choices lead us here. And thank you, thank you, thank you for that.
During my journey with Cambell and Lorenzo I opened Chalice. The church of all that is, the church of Alice. The church of all land is ice. The church of all land is matter, The church of all land is our mother an organic matrix. The mother tree. The holographic substitute that is time.
Ch-alice is a physical space, a contemporary art gallery, holistic heeling and craft centre. Located at: 11 Gainsborough Street, Sudbury, Suffolk, co10 2eu, England.
I shall be hosting art residencies and respite retreats, if you would like to join me here as part of the Auto Alliance get in contact via the email: churchofallthatis@gmail.com
My suggestion at the end of this journey is that if you want to explore holy, look into the hole of yourself. Go down the rabbit hole of your own creativity, gather and express your own free power.
We are the power machines, the power houses of the future, and if you understand what churches really are you know how to use them correctly. As meeting points. That we are meeting points.
You find the church on top of the hill. On top of the tor. You can tour the country side, see from place to place. And this is how you travel safely from person to person, landmark to landmark. Church to church you move point to point,
Tor means a very special friend, one you held close and choose to spend your time with. Travel with, tour with, journey with. A friend you are attracted to and admire, for their talents and skills, the light they give off. During your touring time with your tor friend, you share those talents, it happens naturally of course, there is no pretense. You learn from each other, from sharing each other’s company. From love, with love. The things you make together are inspired and inspiring. You walk the talk together. This is real touring. The journey. The jaw j our, aw being an opening but awe inspiring light. You open your mouth when something in stunning, when something or someone amazes you. Your gaze meets their light and your eyes are opened wide, filled with light as they discover something new, the new now. Filled with wonder, delight, happiness, joy.
I think they may have it backwards when they represent an opening as dark, from my experience so far being closed leads to or is dark, and being open leads to or is light. And I have the same experience of death,
we are so programmed with it being fearful and sharp and disconnecting. When really it is soft, expansive, full.
How can you be filled by an opening??? How can you be whole from being hole. One point is many points when it is truly holy.
To be holy is to be holographic. And we all are.
If you have forgotten how to access your own hologram, the hologram. All you have to do is look inside, do the recapitulation to discover your patterns. To find the language.
Gurus give us a great impression of helping because there words shine and inspire but to access the holy why, in reality you have to use your own words, because your why is different than everyone else’s why, even if it leads to the same place, undoubtedly the hole journey has differences of opinion. We have all stood on different land, at different times, in different ways, for different reasons.
My reason for joining this journey was that I wanted to be a part of what was happening, I wanted to show up. I thought it would be fun and valuable. I wanted to check myself and make sure I didn’t repeat destructive patterns. In one simple sentence, I wanted to connect, to myself, to others and to the world. Unexpected and delightfully what I found by doing this was the power of my voice, my creativity, I have gained power by showing up.
Voice is a balancing act and this is the gift that this journey with Lorenzo and Cambell has shared with me. It is light, it is the pre-sent, our ability to learn from past mistakes, making the future easier.
I have found balance to be wisdom.
The balance of masculine and feminine. The balance of the left and right brain.
When you step onto a temple site, a sacred site. Two parts of your brain get activated. The left and right temple, and mini seizures are made as light travels between the two. This is because of the resonance of the site. The balance of the site. And so one can have wiser more expanded thoughts in these places etc. Travel to different worlds like a shaman as there brain is aligned.
Drugs can create these experiences by activating the brain but the journey is so opening people often get lost because they can’t find there way back they haven’t done the leg work to navigate their way home, to gather themselves back.
Pilgrimage is the natural way to get more balanced, to get wiser. When we expand our horizons to meet new people and places, different views, we gain perspective, bearing, the ability to navigate choices in better more loving and connective ways.
We open naturally when we tour. To people and place. We expand and grow, because we are our journey, each footprint we have left behind. We are the trail of our tail. So story me and story you, now from the past into the future. Cambell and Lorenzo you are now part of my story. And because of that it is a better one.
And I look forward to hearing any ways you want to further be involved in that story. Please take any parts from what I have said here to use as you wish as testimonial to the journey we have shared together.
Lots of love Antonia x
